Sunday, January 12, 2014

D is for DUMMY

so you know those things that you believe
that are just SO NOT TRUE
but you just keep on believing them?

we all have them
but some people just have a llliiittttle bit of a harder time
with the whole fact vs not fact thing

here i present to you my top 3 favorite REAL LIFE I WAS THERE stories
about people defending what they thought WAS SO TRUE
but in the end they were just plain wrong

(SIDE NOTE: one of these below dummies is me. 10 points if you can guess which one.)


"where does the Y (the big block-letter on the the mountain by BYU) go during the winter?
i never see it
sooo do they take it down?"

(she was then informed that no, the Y is white, and snow is white, so in the winter, it's like CAMOUFLAGE. her life was probably never the same after that.)

how i imagine her imagining them taking down the Y. 


(in nutrition class)

(other person tries to explain that jam is made from fruit, but is not actually a fruit)

it turns out this dummy was right... kind of.


was told by her friend that when a stop sign has white around it
like, you don't have to stop
unless you want to

dummy #3 gets pulled over 
tells the police officer that it was a stoptional and no one was coming

police officer laughs so hard she almost pees
and tells dummy #3 to

this kind of stop sign really would have been useful to dummy #3

OK. Now I want to hear about everyone (anyone?) who reads this blogs biggest dummy moment. or their roommates biggest dummy moment. or whatever. please. just do it for D is for DUMMY part 2.

(email them to

AND while you are sending me your stories... listen to this.


Thursday, December 19, 2013


it's been kinda silent around here y'all
i'm so sorry
i still love you bloggy

i have a real post just waiting to be written
but that requires, ya know, time

so for now, this is all i have

no one can put this quite stressful and time consuming semester into words quite like this guy
(whoever he is)

thanks to facebook, for turning into a place where people only share articles, videos(like this one), and baby pictures

Sunday, September 29, 2013


i had a stellar blog post planned for today
but that will have to wait
because about 15 minutes ago
my universe changed 


those are my pearly whites 
that i love
and am very self-concious about

and there, on the front right tooth
(ok it's not like half of my tooth is gone but its still super awky looking)

because my husband tried to kiss me
and hit my teeth with his teeth
(can we be more like 15 year olds?)
and chipped my tooth

i immediately called my family
and they laughed at me
and then comforted me

and bryson will only be sleeping on the porch tonight
not on the roof 

Sunday, September 15, 2013

a future break-up post


i really don't like provo
(i know, it's not really new news)

but seriously,
these past two weeks have been

i had to deal with one very very rude semi-relative
our car broke
our rent was returned, twice, because of bank errors
(and yes, we had to pay for their mistakes)
my papa died
and i look horrible in some recent facebook pictures

guys. like literally WHAT IS HAPPENING?

i swear provo is just trying to get rid of me, too.

it's like in middle school
when my friend sarah was trying to get her boyfriend ben
to break up with her 
because she didn't want to feel bad
but she was sooo over him

her plot didn't really end well for anyone
especially for her dog
who ben dyed green
when she actually did break up with him.

(guys, that's a real story. middle schoolers be cray-cray.)

and my complain fest is done now,
because really, despite where it's located,
i love BYU
and i'll miss it when i'm gone
(in just 3 short semesters)

until then provo,
try and not kill me.

(this is not the actual green dog from the story, but hey, a green dog is a green dog)

(because you need to listen to it)

Saturday, July 27, 2013

squanto and the other things

meet squanto

caleb butler perry
i love him already
and i haven't even met him
congrats to my best friend kristiney and her husby kirk.

1. i've been babysitting the nerdiest children this past week.
 i never knew that a peck was 30 of something
but they did
and i still haven't been able to convince them that i actually go to college
dang it.

2. all these missionaries are coming home
and then they get on facebook
 and i'm like WAIT
i forgot you even existed.

3. this old couple kills me
"i make dirt"
tho old man especially
bryson in 70 years?

Sunday, July 21, 2013

life in 7 seconds



just because:

how i wake up every day because life is just grand:

also. this song. i just can't stop listening. 

Thursday, June 13, 2013


You are tired,
(I think)
Of the always puzzle of living and doing;
And so am I.

Come with me, then,
And we'll leave it far and far away—
(Only you and I, understand!)

You have played,
(I think)
And broke the toys you were fondest of,
And are a little tired now;
Tired of things that break, and—
Just tired.
So am I.

But I come with a dream in my eyes tonight,
And knock with a rose at the hopeless gate of your heart—
Open to me!
For I will show you the places Nobody knows,
And, if you like,
The perfect places of Sleep.

Ah, come with me!
I'll blow you that wonderful bubble, the moon,
That floats forever and a day;
I'll sing you the jacinth song
Of the probable stars;
I will attempt the unstartled steppes of dream,
Until I find the Only Flower,
Which shall keep (I think) your little heart
While the moon comes out of the sea.

e.e. cummings

when i turn purple with anger over a betrayal of trust
or i can't sleep with nightmares of a former life
or i beg in tears to not have to leave this place and face provo this fall

i am so lucky to have a husband that will calm me down
with kind words and sweet promises
unmatched even by my beloved e.e.